DECISIONS
OF THE HEART
BY: ANNIEO
Chapter Three
Missing
Conrad Hauser glanced at the women sitting next to him, a thousand thoughts running through his mind at once. She turned a questioning look on her face as she regarded him with her deep blue eyes.
“You look like you have a few questions you want to ask.” She continued to stare waiting for his response.
He chuckled softly “More then a few.”
“And.?” She put down the magazine she was reading.
“Well, I guess just tell me about him.”
“Alright, I guess I’ll start at the beginning,” She paused and took a deep breath, “Well he was born on May 23rd 1993 at 3:30am, he was just over six pounds and 17 inches long. He had a head full of hair and his father’s eyes. I tried to call, but I couldn’t. I guess I still felt guilty about leaving like I did.” She glanced away. “ He took his first step when he was Thirteen months old and has been running ever since. His first word was Mom, followed quickly by ‘no’.”
“What does he like to do?”
She thought for a moment before answering. “He’s into sports he plays on little league, soccer, and Jr. ice hockey. But I would have to say his favorite thing to do is karate. “
“Is he as good as his Mom?” Conrad asked a small smile coming to his face
“Better then I was at his age actually.”
“What about school?”
“He’s top of his class, one grade ahead in math, two in sciences. He also tends to be the class clown, something I think he got that from his Dad’s side of the family. “ She laughed softly “At least from his Uncle on that side.”
“Oh I don’t know I’m sure you were a hand full when you were that age.” Conrad teased
Shana just smiled “Who me? What would ever give you that idea?”
“I was the victim of some of your jokes remember.” He’s smile disappeared as he noticed the serious expression on Shana’s face. “What?”
She seemed to take a moment to think of the words to say before speaking. “I need to ask something, and its not going to be easy for you. For now could you not tell Jarred you’re his father. Wait before you say anything, let me explain.” She said noting the look on his face. “ I want to be the one to tell him, I just have to figure out how. It should come from me, it’s my fault that he doesn’t know you and vise versa.”
Conrad seemed to consider her words for a moment, “Ok, for now I’ll go along,”
“Thank you, I promise I will tell him as soon as I can.” Just then the pilot came over the intercom announcing there decent into Atlanta.
****************************
O’Hara Residence
Patrick O’Hara chuckled to himself as he heard his Grandson sneaking down the stairs for the hundredth time that night.
“Jarred,” He smiled as he heard Jarred mumble “What are you doing up again?”
“I saw some lights, and Mom said that……”
“Your Mom will have just landed and not even had time to get off the plane yet alone drive here. Now she said that she would pick you up tomorrow, so I think you need to get back to bed young man.”
“But what if she landed early and she….” He tried to stall
“Jarred Sean” Patrick said placing a hint of anger in his voice
Jarred stopped his argument and sighed.. “I know back to bed.”
“Don’t worry she’ll be here tomorrow after school to get you.” He glanced at the clock “Jarred, have you looked at the time yet?”
He paused at the bottom of the stairs. “No,” he looked quickly “Whoops, sorry Grandpa, I forgot.”
“You know you can’t forget, now come on lets go get you you’re shot and then right back to bed.”
“Yes, sir.”
************
“Well here we are.” Shana said as she pulled into her driveway. “I made up the spare room for you.”
“I can find a hotel if you would rather…”
“No,” She interrupted, “ I want you to stay here, it will give us time to talk. Besides most of the hotels are booked, there’s a big convention going on in town this week.” She said as she pulled the door open and allowed Conrad to enter the little house.
“ Come on I’ll take you to your room.”
Conrad followed her through the house glancing this way and that. He noticed the pictures hanging in the hall and stopped to glance at them. He smiled as he noticed one in particular, it was of the Joe team. Taken only a few months before Shana had left. He quickly surpresed the anger that threatened to build up in him and continued down the hall to the doorway Shana as standing in. “I see you kept the team photo.”
“Yah, it was a special part of my life Conrad and there are lots of things that I want to remember about it.” She pulled open the door, “
Would you like some Coffee?”
“Sure,” He answered allowing her to change the subject. “ So where’s Jarred?”
“At Dad’s. He’ll go to school from there and I’ll pick him up after words. Here ya go.” She handed him a cup and walked into the living room.
“So, what are you doing with yourself now?” Conrad asked as he sipped at his coffee and took a seat on the couch.
“Well I teach three days a week at the Dad’s dojo, and work as a civilian consultant at the military base intelligence division. Basically I look over their stuff and advice them on how to improve it. I also teach advanced hand to hand combat there.”
“Sounds like you keep busy.” He stood and walked around the room glancing at the photos of Jarred on the wall. . “He looks like a good Kid Shana.”
“He is.” She answered as she came up beside him. “He has his fathers sense of honor and his mothers determination.”
“Shana,” He turned to look at her, “What really made you decide to come and tell me?”
She glanced away and was silent for several moments before answering. “Jarred.” She answered when she finally spoke. “He started asking questions recently he wants to know who his father is. I can’t answer that for him, I was hoping that maybe you would.” She glanced back at Conrad, her eyes moist with unshed tears.
Conrad slowly waked over to her and pulled her into his embrace allowing her to give vent to her emotions. He waited a moment before speaking. “Shana, if you want me to be a father to him, then you need to tell him. You where right it’s not my place to, but I can’t be a father till he knows the truth.”
Shana pulled back and glanced into Conrad’s eyes, “On his birthday, I’ll tell him on his birthday before the party tomorrow night.”
“Alright, I can wait till then.” He said as he wiped away a tear from her cheek
“Thank you Conrad.”
*****************************
Jarred shuffled in his chair and glanced up at the clock, noting that there was only ten minutes left till the bell., “Jarred,” He jumped in surprise as the teacher called his name. “Would you please take over from where Ann stopped.”
Jarred pulled his attention back to his studies and glanced down at the book that they were reading. “Jarred, do you know what page we’re on?”
“No. Miss. Walters.”
“Sit down Jarred, and stay after class is dismissed please.”
“Yes Miss. Walters.” Jarred said as he retook his seat.
Shana stood outside the school waiting for Jarred to be released for the day. A single thought kept running through her head. “How am I going to tell him?” She thought to herself. “How do you tell a seven year old that you never told his father that he existed? And then how do you make it up to them?” She was drawn back into the real world by the sound of the bell ringing. She watched as the children came running out of the building, but didn’t see Jarred anywhere. “Mike, have you seen Jarred?” She asked one of Jarred’s friends.
“Yah, Miss. Walters kept him after.”
“Thank you Mike.” She entered the building and went to see what her son had done this time. She heard voices as she approached Jarred’s classroom and took a moment to glance in the window. Inside Jarred was reading from a textbook to Miss. Walters. She softly knocked on the door and entered the room. Jarred glanced up from his reading and a large smile came to his face.
“Mom!” Shana smiled back and indicated for him to continue with his task.
“I think that will be enough Jarred, go and get your books I need to talk with your mother.” Miss. Walters said.
“Go wait for me buy the car please.” Shana said after she had hugged Jarred hello. She waited a few moment s after Jarred had left the room before turning her attention to his teacher. “What has he done this time?”
“Nothing major, Miss. O’Hara, I am however concerned about something. We had Father’s Day last week and Jarred came with his Grandfather. Now I do realize that you are a single mother, and not the only one with a child in my class, but Jarred has been having problems with the aspect that he doesn’t know who his father is. His attention span has been terrible lately. This is the third time in two weeks I have kept him after school.” Miss. Walters turned and picked up a piece of paper off her desk. “This is the number of a very good child psychologist.”
Shana held up her hand stopping Miss. Walters mid-sentence. “I don’t need to hear anymore, Jarred does not need to have a shrink digging around in his head. I promise that his behavior will improve and that’s all that matters.” Shana turned to leave.
“Miss O’Hara, he needs help dealing with this.”
“And I will take care of it.” She glanced back at the teacher her blue eyes dark with anger. “Good day Miss. Walters.” She walked out of the room trying to get her anger under control before she reached Jarred. She exited the building and saw him sitting by the car waiting for her.
“Mom, am I in trouble?” He asked when she had reached the car.
“No, not as long as you start paying more attention in class. If it happens again then you will be understood?”
“Yes,” He said as he got into the car and they started their drive home. “Are we going to Grandpa’s tonight?” He asked after the silence hung for several minutes.
Shana smiled, “Now why would we want to go there?” She said in a teasing voice
“It is the 23rd.”
“Is that a special date that I should remember?”
“Come on Mom.” Shana chuckled at the tone in Jarred’s voice.
“Yes, we are going to Grandpa’s tonight, and there’s someone I want you to meet.”
“Really? Who?”
“An old friend of mine, the reason I had to go away on the trip.” Shana felt a small flutter in her stomach as she once again thought of what may happen when she told Jarred.
************************
Conrad stood outside on the deck at the O’Hara residence. His mind trickling back to what Shana had said. Would she do it? Could she do it? How would Jarred respond to it? A million questions ran around in his mind and with each one the feeling of anger and betrayal returned. He turned slightly as he heard the door open and nodded a greeting to the figure that approached.
“Nice night.” Patrick said as he came up beside Conrad. “Shana and Jarred should be here soon.” Conrad nodded. Patrick allowed the silence to last for a few moments. “She never meant to hurt you, she did what she thought was right at the time.”
“Seven years Patrick, seven years, and she couldn’t pick up a phone? Write a letter?” Conrad tried to hold on to his temper.
“I can’t answer for her, but I do know that she has always loved you more then herself, which is why she left. She gave up everything she was and everything she could have been, to protect you. And now she is trying to make it right.” Patrick placed a hand on Conrad’s shoulder. “Give her a chance, don’t throw away everything you two have always had.” With the Patrick turned and went to go back into the house leaving Conrad alone to think.
***********************
“Hello?” Shana said as they came into the house. “Dad?”
“Well there’s the Birthday Boy.” Patrick said as he entered the front room. “Why don’t you go in the dinning room Jarred and see what the mob is up to.”
“Where’s Conrad” Shana asked after Jarred had left the room.
“Out on the deck.” Shana nodded and headed out to the deck.
Conrad was still standing there, mulling over the words the Patrick had said when Shana came and stood beside him. “You look like you want to say something.” She said after standing there for a few moments..
“Yah, I want to know why? Why did you wait so long? It’s been seven years Shana. You could have picked up the phone, wrote a note, sent a telegram anything.” Conrad tried hard to hold on to his temper. “He grow up without a father, he’s seven years old and I don’t even know what he likes to do.. To him I an a total stranger, and you could have stopped that from happening.” Conrad’s eyes were dark with anger.
“Conrad I…..”
“Mom? “
Shana turned sharply and saw Jarred standing at the doorway. “Jarred, I told you to wait in the house for me.” Conrad came forward and stared at the boy, his heart pounding. “Conrad please…..” Shana whispered
“No, no more lies Shana, he deserves to know.” Shana grabbed Conrad’s hand and silently pleaded with him. “Tell him.”
Shana closed her eyes for a moment and tried to form the words in her mind before she spoke them. She slowly knelt down to be eye level with Jarred she never got the chance to say anything.
“Is he my Dad?” Jarred asked. All Shana could do was glance back at Conrad, her eyes filled with tears and nod a yes to Jarred.
Jarred stood there his face in an expression of shock. He slowly backed away from his Mother despite the pleading in her eyes. “Jarred please.”
Jarred looked back at his mother. “Why didn’t you tell me? All I ever wanted was a Dad, and you never told me I had one.” Jarred said his voice cracking “I hate you!”
“Jarred!” Shana yelled as he took off running out of the yard. She turned and regarded Conrad for a moment before speaking. “I was going to tell him.” Her tears running freely now., “I was going to tell him. He shouldn’t have found out like this. Damn you! I was going to tell him!” Her anger erupted and she slapped Conrad on the cheek, then turned and ran into the darkness.
Conrad stood there in shock, unsure of what to do. “Go after her.” A voice said from behind him. “Don’t loose everything by being as stubborn as she is.” Patrick said as he came up beside Conrad.
He just remained there lightly touching the cheek Shana had slapped. “Tell her I went home, and that I am sorry.” He turned to leave.
“Don’t do it.” Patrick spoke, his eyes pleading. Conrad just shook his head and walked out of the house into the night.
*************************
Shana quietly entered the house an hour later and made her way into the kitchen. “He’s gone.” She turned quickly around in the direction of the voice.
“What?”
“Conrad left, said to tell you he was going home and that he was sorry.” Patrick came up beside his daughter.
Shana stood there in shock, her eyes once again welling up with tears. “Daddy,” She spoke softly, “I don’t know what to do.”
“Don’t let him go again Shana.” He took her into his embrace, “You and Jarred need him, more then you care to admit.”
She sighed deeply regaining control of her emotions. “I better go talk to him. Where’s Jarred?”
Patrick looked confused, “I thought you were with him.”
“No, I went looking for him, but I thought he would have come back by now.” She glanced quickly at the clock and began to feel the first wave of panic hit. “It’s 9:00,” She quickly walked to the fridge, “Dad, he’s dose is still here.” Her heart was pounding, she couldn’t breath, “He didn’t take his shot.” The room began to spin Patrick quickly went to his daughter and forced her to sit.
“Shana, take a deep breath, we’ll find him.” Patrick grabbed the phone. “Brian, get your brothers together and come over right away, Jarred’s missing.” He listened for a moment before hanging up and returning his attention to Shana. “There going to be right over.”
“Call Conrad.” She said when she finally found her voice. “He needs to know.” Patrick nodded and dialed Shana’s house handing the phone to her the machine picked up. “Conrad, I need you to come back to Dad’s.”
“Why? What’s wrong?” He asked when he picked up the phone recognizing the worried tone in Shana’s voice.
“Jarred’s missing.” Her voice caught in her throat.
“I’m sure he’ll be back when he’s ready. He needs some time to think is all.”
“No, you don’t understand, he doesn’t have time, an hour maybe two but not any longer then that.”
“What are you talking about Shana?” Conrad asked not quit understanding.
“Jarred is a diabetic, he should have had his shot by now, if we don’t find him….”
“I’ll be right there.” She heard the click of him hanging up the phone.
“Shana, why don’t you start calling his friends, the boys and I will start waking the neighborhood.” Patrick said as he heard his sons enter the house. She nodded and quickly began her task.
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Continued in Chapter Four-A!
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