DON'T MESS WITH THE NAVY
BY: THE BARD

Part Five
An Army Of One

    “…this is a elite anti-terrorist force, not some university frat. The entire immature, irresponsible, unbecoming incident is an embarrassment to this outfit. What in the hell possessed you? Grown men, soldiers, officers some of you…this is a TEAM…you do not haze one another…you do not set Joe against Joe and then bet on the outcome…”

    “I can’t believe he still going…” Shipwreck whispered as he glanced at his watch. The offending Joes had all piled into Hawk’s office and were presently cowering in the corner.

    “We’re dead.” Wetsuit moaned. “I haven’t seen him this livid since you and Footloose threw that party in the mess hall the night that the Joint Chiefs of Staff came for a tour of the base.”

    “Or since Mainframe was caught using the main server to play DOOM.” Dialtone shuddered.

    “It wasn’t as bad as when you tried to have the Star Trek convention here and Hawk found a replica of a Romulan War Bird in his parking spot.” Mainframe countered.

    “Shut up, you two…you want to get us all into more trouble?” Leatherneck growled.

    “This from the man who was once streaked naked through the mess hall.” Mainframe harrumphed.

    “This is the LAST time I get involved in one of your little schemes, Shipwreck.” Gung Ho sighed as he warily watched Hawk pace around the room.

    “That’s what you said last time…”Torpedo laughed softly, “ and the time before that…”

    “Would you look at Duke.” Ace hissed, “He is so mad he hasn’t said word yet. He is just standing there glaring. It’s freaking me out.”

    “Freaking you out?” Falcon’s nasal voice cut in, Flint having broken his nose during ‘the incident’, “He is glaring at me! I don’t know why I am even here…I am the victim!”

    “Victim…hah…” Shipwreck snorted, “You started this whole thing, kid. You should know better than to go after Lady Jaye…”

    “YOU told me she was available…”

    “…did I lie? No. If you had taken your head out of your ass long enough to look around you might have noticed that Flint is a bit protective of her…”

    “A bit protective?” Falcon’s voice rose of its own accord, “A bit protective?!! The man is INSANE! He could have killed me…and you made a profit out of it.”

    “No he didn’t.” Ace snickered. “Our resident schemer was out-schemed.”

    “Shut up, Ace.”

    “Well at least something positive came out of this, “ Falcon attempted to smile, a horrific thing given his battered condition, “That and the satisfaction of knowing that Flint is going to kick your six as soon as he finds out you are behind this.”

    “Flint is my buddy…he would never lay a hand on me.” Shipwreck’s voice didn’t sound very confident, and his face revealed his anxiety.

    “SHIPWRECK AND FALCON!!!” Duke bellowed “SNAP TO”

    The two soldiers immediately stood rigid at attention, their differences forgotten in the face of the general’s ire. The Sergeant was in their faces in three long strides.

    “Are you two ARGUING? Talking while the general…your CO…is speaking?” He spat, “Do you not have an ounce of sense in that head of yours, Falcon?”

    Shipreck smirked, but immediately wiped it off as Duke swung around and fixed him with his ice blue eyes

    “AND YOU…I don’t know how many times I have to go through this with you!” Duke barked, “In fact, the only reason you are still here is because you can fight like a demon and Flint wants you on the team. Although I wonder if that is going to remain the case when he finds out who is behind this whole thing.”

    “That is what I was just saying…” Falcon piped up only to be shot down in mid sentence.

    “Oh…you are just as guilty you arrogant little….ARGH!…You still haven’t learned to keep it in your pants, have you?”

    “But Conrad…”

    “SHUT IT SOLDIER. This is a TEAM…you WILL learn to work with your fellow Joes. You will treat them with respect. You brought his upon yourself. If Flint hadn’t pummeled you someone else would have sooner or later. Although I am definitely less than thrilled that one of my senior officers and the third in command of this outfit chose to take the bait.”

    Duke turned to the group of Joes.

    “All of you…get your sorry butts out of my site! I expect you to pick up the cleaning supplies at 0400 tomorrow and get to work on the bathrooms ASAP. Shipwreck, Falcon…stay where you are.”

    “Umm General Hawk...sir ” Shipwreck started when the others were gone, flinching as the irate general turned towards him, his face a mask. “Flint isn’t going to get in trouble over this, is he…”

    “Starting to feel a little guilty, Hector?” Hawk spoke…it wasn’t a question. “As much as he was goaded into this I can’t have my Third flying off the handle every time someone goes near his partner, can I?”

    “No…Flint is in trouble. But it’s not me who is going to mete out his punishment. And from the look in his eyes when I sent him off, I think he would rather face a division of COBRA troops than Lady Jaye right now.” The general sat down on his chair and leaned back, “I almost feel sorry for the guy…but as I told him…shit or get off the pot.”

    “I’m dead…” Shipwreck moaned.

    “Oh yeah.” Hawk leaned forward and grinned evilly, “If I were you I would avoid Flint for the next little while. Not that it’s going to be a problem where you are heading…”

    “Falcon, Shipwreck…you two are going to learn to work together, and respect each other even if it kills you. And with that in mind…both of you are off for a month in the Slaughterhouse.”

    “WHAT!?” Shipwreck’s eyes grew wide. “Oh god oh god oh god…”

    “You can’t be serious…” Falcon looked at his brother, “Duke…I had nothing to do with this…”

    “Like hell you didn’t!” Duke smiled but there was no humor in it, “You have A LOT to learn little brother.”

    “The Sarge is expecting you both early tomorrow morning. Now go and pack your bags…DISMISSED!”

    After the two dejected Joes had left the office and closed the door behind them, Duke sighed and shook his head.

    “I can’t believe I am related to him.”

    “I don’t know…I seem to remember two cocky arrogant young soldiers appearing on my doorstep a few years ago. One a full of himself blond and the other an arrogant, beret clad ladies man.”

    “We weren’t that bad…” Duke frowned and Hawk laughed softly.

    “Yeah…RIGHT. I don’t know which one of you was worse.” The General smiled and leaned back in his chair, “By the way…who ended up winning that pool?”

    Duke smiled and shook his head. “You wouldn’t believe it if I told you…”

************************************************************************

    “Stand STILL…”

    “ow…ow…OW!”

    “Don’t be such a baby…I’m just cleaning it.“ Lady Jaye grabbed Flint by the arm and pulled him back down onto the bed in the infirmary and continued to dab the cut over his eye with disinfectant.

   “God woman…GENTLE! Where did you learn first aid, Buchenwald?”

    “Oh…so the great Flint has finally found his voice?” she snapped, “ I guess that little testosterone showdown turned your brain back on…at least one of your brains.”

    Flint was still wearing only sweatpants and his dog tags as he sat rigid on the examining table while his partner went over his injuries, and unfortunately, his body wasn’t the only thing that was becoming rigid…She was in a tight fitting white tee shirt and shorts, and her proximity to him was beginning to affect his body in the usual way.

    “Very funny…” he crossed his legs nonchalantly but if she hadn’t noticed the tell tale sign in his lower area, the blush was certainly going to give it away “…for your information I was defending your honor…”

    “I can defend my honor perfectly well myself and you know it. That whole thing was about one thing and one thing only…your bloody pride.”

    “PRIDE! I don’t think you…” He stopped mid sentence as her hands made their way to his bare chest. He pulled back so sharply he fell off the table.

    “WHAT THE HELL IS A MATTER WITH YOU LATELY!?”

    She looked over the table to find Flint lying in a heap on the floor.

    ”I felt…I mean I saw…I thought I saw a spider.”

    “A spider…”

    “Ummmm…yeah” he managed as he sheepishly pulled himself up and back onto the bed.

    Lady Jaye shook her head and sighed and this time he managed to remain in place as she continued to examine his wounds…gently, softly…unconsciously, he felt his body start to relax under her ministrations…

    WHACK!

    “OW! What the hell was that for!!!” His hand flew to the place on the back of his head where she had struck him.

    “YOUR GIRL?”

    “Oh…heh heh…ummm…well…”

    “You are getting that ‘deer caught in the headlights’ looks again, Flint.” Her eyes narrowed, “spit it out.”

    “Well…ummm…you see…I got a little jealous.”

    “A little jealous?”

    “And he was coming on to you so strongly…”

    “Go on…”

    “And I didn’t want him to have you.”

    The silence in the room was deafening.

    “And is that what happened with Ron Michaels?”

    Flint nodded.

    “And Matthew Burke?”
    
    He nodded again, his eyes downcast.

    “And Alpine…”

    “Come on, I am not THAT bad…”

    “No, you are one hundred times worse.” She moved forward and resumed treating his wounds. “God Flint…you don’t want me, but no one else can have me…is that it?”

    “I never said…”

    “No, you never say anything lately without stumbling over the words and then running off. I thought we were best friends…”

    “We were…we are…Jaye…Allie…” he struggled over the words as she watched him intently. “I just…I can’t…” Flint stopped and stared at her for a moment, his eyes darting to the door and back to her then back to the door.

    “Are you looking for an escape?”

    “No…no….” he paused and looked down at his feet. “Yes…OW! Stop that!”

    “Damn it Flint…what happened to us? Why are you like this lately?”

    “Because I’m mrph mumble murph…” he mumbled the last words under his breath.

    “I don’t speak gibberish Flint…”

    “Because I’m in love with you…damn it.” He moved his hand to indicate where she had punched him hard…”although at the moment I am seriously reconsidering…”

    “What? You…I …we…how…” Lady Jaye stood stunned as a grin slowly formed on Flint’s face.

    “Ah…who’s speaking gibberish now?” Flint shook his head, “So…now you know. The question is what are we going to do about it?”    

    She looked up at him and grinned. “I’M not going to DO anything…”

    He frowned, sadness creeping into the corner of his eyes before she moved forward and gently kissed him on the forehead.

    “You…on the other hand…are taking me out to dinner and a night on the town.”

    “I am?”

    “Yes you are…” as he watched her, his eyebrow raised in curiosity, she reached into her pocket and pulled out a wad of cash, “…on Navy’s dime.”

    “Where did you…?” a lopsided grin slowly began to form on his face as he realized what she had done “…you played us all, you little imp.”

    “Hey…he was challenging Army? I just reminded him of the supremacy of the ‘Army of One’…those Squids never had a chance.”

    “Neither did I it seems…”

    “Nope…not from the day I met you, pretty boy. You forgot the cardinal rule…never underestimate the power of a woman in love…”

    “In love?” He got up and reached for he, but she nimbly danced out of his reach.

    “Very much so…”

    “With anyone in particular?” He growled as he tried to catch her again but she was too fast.

    “Hmmm…you might know him…tall, dark, handsome…wears a beret…code name starts with an F…”

    “Not Falcon, I hope…” He caught her finally and drew her in to his embrace.

    “You’ll just have to find out who it is over dinner now, won’t you?” She leaned forward and kissed him passionately then extricated herself from his arms and walked out the door.

    Flint stood there staring at her retreating form before shaking his head and smiling.

    “Go Army…”

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